BloG #29: An Exercise In Futility? Or...

Twas the night after Thanksgiving when all through the west,
Not a creature was stirring - not even a guest.

The tryptophan was settled in our bellies with care,
In hopes that college football soon would be there...


Unfortunately, Nebraska pulled one away from Colorado today, but these days the University of Colorado football program has not given the casual fan much to cheer about, other than remaining somewhat controversy-free for a couple years now. In terms of finding something to be thankful for, I guess that would be it for CU football. At least it appears Iowa will be bowl-bound. What a way to finish their regular season with a 55-0 trouncing over Minnesota!! Way-to-go Hawkeyes!!!

As for other things beyond college football, I am thankful to have finally had family to celebrate a Colorado Thanksgiving with for once. This is a new thing, after all the years I have lived in Colorado with my wife & daughters. We joined my mother & cousin for a beautiful dinner in Longmont, then enjoyed shopping & the Christmas Parade in Estes Park the next evening before consuming Thanksgiving leftovers at our Timeshare in Estes.

As mentioned in a previous blog, 2008 has been a year of much change for me & the changes keep coming! This weekend will mark the end of an era for me, to be immediately followed by a new one. Every Sunday for the last 5 - 7 years, I have been playing piano/organ for 2 churches in the Colorado Roaring Fork Valley. 5 years at one church & 7 years at the other.

After this Sunday, I will be changing churches. A mentor, whom I owe a debt of gratitude for inspiring me to take on such a ministry, is retiring at the church I previously attended. Big shoes to fill & while I can never replace her, I hope to at least fulfill and continue the inspiring music ministry that has been such a tradition at this church.

This move comes with mixed emotions. While I am excited at the new prospects from moving to a bigger church and the potential opportunities, I grieve the loss of what has become a family to me at the church I am leaving. I have learned from past experience that leaving a positive relationship can be painful and sometimes leave you full of regret.

The church I am leaving has been extremely good to me for the 5 years I have been there and while I leave them with no regrets, I am mindful that they may be without a full replacement for awhile. Changing teaching assignments earlier this year actually resulted in a similar situation. And in the last 2 weeks, I have had to choose between the two schools I am currently teaching at. Very soon, I will be only teaching at one of those schools, due to rapid growth and addition of a new music teaching position.

I am finding myself needing to make choices quickly and consider what may ultimately offer me the most bang for my own buck. Having been burned in the process more than once, I move forward on these choices with a slight degree of trepidation. People, including myself & my family, are affected by what I choose and I am highly mindful of that.

On another note, I am excited about losing 25 lbs since summer and looking forward to losing 25 more before next summer. The key for me has been to go slow & steady. I seem to have stumbled upon a couple changes in lifestyle that are helping to push back the years of punishment that I had been previously placing on my system. Primarily, replacing a singular bad dietary choice with a much better one.

Time will tell whether all the changes I have plowed through this year will ultimately be positive or another exercise in futility and self-destruction, as with previous attempts at throwing caution to the wind. Meanwhile, I prefer to think my father has had a hand in some of the positive changes for me this year after losing him to complications from cancer. I know it may sound crazy & a bit out there, but it helps me to move on & begin to accept his premature loss.

If you have read this post this far, I want to apologize for taking such precious time from your otherwise productive day. While this writing is my own exercise in finding a voice in text, you are by no means obligated to suffer through reading such an exercise. But if you did, you have both my congratulations and condolences. =)

-blessings,

Jeff